Kerosene Spill - Slippery Slope

Last Saturday it was near 60 degrees out - great weather to help the curb appeal for the house and get some stuff packed out of the garage!  However, what is the FIRST thing I find in the the garage - a kerosene spill!

It seems that our kerosene container was tipped sideways and the air hole side let kerosene drip out slowly onto the floor!

This is an hour-long set-back I wasn't expecting. I quickly got the bounty towels and began to clean the spill but oddly I found myself slipping and sliding all over the place as I walked in it.  I had to put down folded boxes on the floor just to walk without slipping.  It was just as slippery as ice!

Is there any lesson in this?  Well, kerosens is used mostly for lighting, heating, cooking and it is even used for transportation so it's very useful indeed.  However, when spilled on a painted concrete floor it becomes useless and as slippery as ice.

Our walk with God should be like kerosene when it is used properly.  When our walk with Jesus is right, then we become the fuel to light the way for others to comes to salvation.  Light is necessary for not only life, but for growth as well.  We were given a Herodian lamp just like this one when we were living in Israel.  These are the oil lamps most likely used in the parabable of the watchful servants from Luke 12:35-36

 “Be dressed ready for service and keep your lamps burning, like servants waiting for their master to return from a wedding banquet, so that when he comes and knocks they can immediately open the door for him."

Being a fuel burning light for the Lord is very important;  Luke 11:33-36 says,

“No one lights a lamp and puts it in a place where it will be hidden, or under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, so that those who come in may see the light.  Your eye is the lamp of your body. When your eyes are healthy, your whole body also is full of light. But when they are unhealthy, your body also is full of darkness.  See to it, then, that the light within you is not darkness.  Therefore, if your whole body is full of light, and no part of it dark, it will be just as full of light as when a lamp shines its light on you.”

When we are a light to others of God's unfailing love and his faithfulness in our lives, then we become like Jesus because he said of himself,

^"In him was life,and that life was the light of all mankind.  The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it."

 (John 1:4-5)

"While I am in the world, I am the light of the world.” (John 9:5)

Our testimony can warm up a cold heart toward God.  

But if I say, “I will not mention his word
    or speak anymore in his name,”
his word is in my heart like a fire,
    a fire shut up in my bones.
I am weary of holding it in;
    indeed, I cannot."  Jeremiah 20:9

Saul was a man who had a heart after the God in his early years.  Because of that, God blessed him and he became the first king of Israel.  However, he slowly let his heart grow cold toward things of God which was to his own demise.  In contrast, Acts chapter 2 records the first sermon which was told by the Apostle Peter.  He gives his testimony as he is filled, burning with the Holy Spirit and in that day, three thousand people come into the kingdom of God!

Perhaps we can become the fuel to feed the hungry soul concerning God's Words in discipleship or Bible Study.  Jesus speaks of himself in John:

“I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never go hungry, and whoever believes in me will never be thirsty." (John 6:35)

God's taught word is our spiritual food.  Just as the body cannot live without food - and the very basic food for mankind has always been a type of bread, so it is fitting for the Lord to use bread in the allageny.  The bread I'm speaking of was called manna, which basically meant "what is it?"  During the 40 years the children of Israel were wandering in the desert God fed them from the skies with manna.

Yet he gave a command to the skies above
    and opened the doors of the heavens;
 he rained down manna for the people to eat,
    he gave them the grain of heaven.
 Human beings ate the bread of angels;
    he sent them all the food they could eat. (Psalm 78:23-35)

Interesting is it that this manna wouldn't last the night.  Talk about throwing away bread!  The next day the manna was moldy and they would have to go out every day and get more.  The only time it would last more than a day was on the Sabbath - on the Sabbath it would last so the people wouldn't have to get more.  Every day and every week they were witnessing a miracle.

Our hungry soul needs manna from heaven.  Not just once a week, but daily.  We need our daily dose and on Sundays a whole heaping more because it's the only kind of bread that will last an eternity.

This is the bread that came down from heaven. Your ancestors ate manna and died, but whoever feeds on this bread will live forever.” (John 6:58)

Lastly, the fuel burning for Jesus inside of us will ultimately one day transport those who we have brought to the Lord heaven bound - on the glory jet in the sky.  

"Then I saw “a new heaven and a new earth,” for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea.  I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband.  And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Look! God’s dwelling place is now among the people, and he will dwell with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God." Revelation 21:2-3

When our walk is property alligned with God's Word, we are using it propertly and we will be used as a fuel for the Lord in many ways.

However, suppose the fuel God plans to use for His glory is wasted?  Perhaps it's dripped out mindlessly onto the empty floor?  We don't use the gifts, the knowledge the Lord has given us; we simply just waste it.  The potential is there, but it all drips out before any fire is set to it.   Then it's good for nothing except to be cleaned up and thrown away.

When we become saved and filled with His Spirit, Jesus gives us His holy Spirit which is like the kerosene - he begins lighting a fire in our hearts and we begin our usefulness for the Kingdom of God.

What if, however, we just keep turning away from the prodding of the Spirit in our lives?  What if we sense or hear his call but we say, "Tomorrow," "Later," "Not now, I'm busy!"  "I don't think I can do that." or sadly, "NO!"  Then I fear that person is toppled over and wasting God's fuel as it drips out of their lives.  Soon,  we stop hearing the Holy Spirit or perhaps, never hear Him again. That is when our lives are walking on a slippery, icy-like floor that will just lead us to a slip-up and a great fall.

Thankfully, this is only an object lesson.  The spill can be cleaned; the canister can be set upright and the drip cease.  We can then just call on Jesus and ask him again to refill and renew our hearts to be used by his Kingdom - and he will.

"Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.  Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded.  Grieve, mourn and wail. Change your laughter to mourning and your joy to gloom.  Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up." (James 4:7-10)

 http://youtubeavi.com/view-video/ZIydUt07wWw

This is actually where I feel I am right now, truthfully.  If nobody ever reads this, I know it has been written at least for my heart.  It's amazing how God does that - speaks to me through my own writings - as I think about these lessons and how they pertain to scripture.  "Thanks God!"

Truth is, I've been saved pretty much all my life and had many periods that my fuel has just been dripping out because I wasn't standing upright.  Yeah, I'm not NOT walking, but I'm not walking with FIRE as I was.  I guess I've been a bit complacent.  Since our move to Cleveland, I feel I've been slowly cooling.  Why?  I could chalk it up a busy schedule, my children's needs, my husband's schedule or a many other things but in reality - it's ALL me!  I need that fire again!

"Dear LORD Jesus,
Please hear my prayer!  I didn't realize I was writing this for myself until the end summary.  If I examine my own heart first, I instantly see the coolness it has become.  Please forgive me, send me your Holy Spirit new and afresh in my heart and begin to light the fire in my to be an effective tool in your kingdom.  There were so many things I thought I'd do for your as a young teen: missionary; public speaker; author; teacher; actress for your glory…the list goes on.  Though I feel a few of them have been touched on, I still feel like Moses waiting in the desert.  I need YOUR fire; YOUR power; YOUR strengthen to live out the rest of my days to LIFT you up.  Thank you Jesus for what you have ahead of me.  Thank you that you are always a God who can use cracked pots and empty kerosene containers.  In Jesus name, Amen"

The Parable of the Butterfly in our Lives

September 23, 2007 in Devotional by Esther Lindsey | Permalink(edit)

The following is NOT the traditional story about becoming a butterfly, but it IS a new point of view of already being a battered butterfly.

This late summer we had the privledge of raising a monach caterpillar.  My friend Rachel gave us one that had hatched from an egg that morning.  I had no idea how to raise it, but with Rachel’s guidance, we were able to watch it grow from a speck on the table to a 2" long very hungry caterpillar.  

Unlike the popular children’s book, they DON’T eat just anything.  They only eat milkweed (and they enjoy a watermelon snack) in which I had to drive a mile away, get some from a field and put a supply in the fridge.  At the end of her caterpillar life, she was consuming about 1 milkweed leaf daily. 

I had her in a very small jelly jar during this time but I could tell it was getting close to the time for her metamorphosis.  So I made a larger habitat for her with two sticks and some milkweed so she could roam around and find a place to hang in her chrysalis.  Would you believe she decieded to hang from just the side of the plastic cage?  Like a spider, she spun silk that stuck like glue to a plastic side. I didn’t even need to put those sticks in there and I dare touch the cage in fear she would fall.

Well, what began as a science experiment, then turned into a spiritual lesson.

About two weeks later, she came out.  That’s when I knew she was a girl – she was light colored, on the small size with no black spot on the back hind wings.  She was beautiful!  I was told the first 24 hours they are not hungry so I could keep her and watch her before I let her go - so I did.  But when we attempted to set her free, she couldn’t fly!  WHY?  

The poor thing just fluttered on the floor.  Then I noticed her wings had not formed straight but curved.  I suppose the sticks I left in her cage prevented her from spreading her wings straight when they were drying.  How would I have known?  I had been afraid touch the cage when she was changing because it seemed like she was just hanging from a thread on the side and I didn’t want to chance her chrysalis from falling.  I thought I was doing the right thing!

I contacted an online monarch association whom explained that her wings are pumped and dried within the first 10 minutes.  I was sleeping then when that happened.  The best thing I could do for her was to keep her indoors and give her a sponge with Juicy Juice and every other day put her on outside flowers so she could drink necter and not ferment. 

Well, for the past 3 weeks that is what I have been doing.  I guess you could say, we have a pet butterfly!  All the kids can hold her and she climbs on them.  

They take turns helping her to get on a patch of flowers in our bed and when she falls, we pick her up again and put her back on the                     flowers.  We check on her every half hour or less and often she is struggling on the mulch and sometimes she is 10-20 feet away in the middle of the lawn!  Sometimes I have to call the kids to help me find her. 

Josiah loves her the most and has named her "Cutie."

The other day when I was out there, two perfectly formed butterflies came prancing over my mangolias almost in a playful game of love catch.  I watched them and pondered, "What a sad little life our little butterfly has".  She has never known the company of another caterpillar or butterfly, nor will she ever know what it is like to use her wings and be what she was created for – to fly free!  She tries and tries, but struggles on the floor and in the meantime her wings are slowly being ripped to shreds, which just make things worse for her.  But now, after 3 weeks, sometimes it seems when I put her on a flower she has learned not to fly.  She will just sit there for a while.  When she does try to fly and falls, if she is close to a flower, she struggles to climb up the stem to the top.  The flower stems get in the way of her flapping wings, hindering her, making it difficult to climb, and further destroying her beautiful wings.  Not only that, but the amount of energy she puts out with all that useless flapping on the ground, makes her even more tired and hungry for nectar in the end.

Though I feel my ignorace has made her in this condition, still she would have been dead within a few days if it weren’t for me taking care of her.   And I always make sure my 3 cats are INSIDE when she it outside feeding on flowers and fluttering on the ground.

I feel God using this butterfly experience for me at this time in my life.  I feel like I am meant to fly, but the things of this world have caused my wings to not grow straight.  I struggle on the earth’s floor, fluttering madly - wanting flight, but in the process my wings are getting battered.  I would have died if it were not for the Loving hand of the Lord who picks me up and brings me to the high places of beauty where I can feed and get refreshing nourishment.  There often, like my handicp surrendered butterfly, I may sit on the flower and not try to fly for a while.  Instead I sit quietly, soaking the fact that I’m where I need to be and God is providing for me.  But then I want to break free I begin trying to fly on my own again.  I can’t!  I am still handicap with the scars of sin on my wings.  As I flap my wings on the floor, I use up so much God-given energy and it just makes me more hungry in the end.  God gently, picks me up again, and brings me back to the place of His provision.  There, back on the top of my flower, I feel like a butterfly.  There and only there, do I feel like a butterfly.

God is speaking to me that throughout this pregancy (being 41 years old) and trying to sell our home.  He says that if I care so much to keep a poor little butterfly alive, who has a life-span of no more than 6 weeks, won’t He do the same and much more for me who is His child and that he bought with his blood and whose soul is eternal?

Though my sorrow goes out to my little butterfly, she’s probably the most loved butterfly in all Medina County.  Unknowingly to her, we love her.  We talk to her, hold her, provide for her, and when she seems done with the nectar from the flower patch, we take her in and put her in a very large plastic clear container with a sponge of Juciy Juice and fresh flowers and grass to make her feel at home.  Oh, she flutters and doesn’t like it – she wants to be free outside to roam, but there are hidden dangers outside.  She knows nothing about being on the ground and we are protecting her.  Not only from our cats, but other critters that roam plus streets she could go into.

Again, this reminds me of the Lord.  Often, after an experience of pleasureable provision from the Lord (like the butterfly on the flower), I begin struggling again and this time the Lord seems to put me in a boxed enviorment with provisions.  Oh, I often don’t see the provisions.  I only see that I am boxed in and want to get out.  The box is see-through so I am able to see what I want outside God’s provision, but the Lord keeps me in to protect me from the outside unknown dangers that I am unable to see.  I need to stay satisfied with what God has provided. "Godliness with contentment is great gain," (1 Tim. 6:6)

And do you think this butterfly has a clue that I’m trying to help it?  Well frankly, I am not sure.  Sometimes she seems that she knows me and clings on to me and other times she seems like it just wants to escape and fly.  Often I say to her, "Hey, don’t you know I’m trying to help you?"

I’m sure God feels the same way about me.  How many times does it seem that all I want to do is cling on the Lord, but then shortly after I try to do things my way when God is saying in the background, "Hey, don’t you know I’m trying to help you?"

The lifespan of a summer butterfly is anywhere between 2-6 weeks and we have had this one for 3 weeks now.  I think we are doing pretty well, don’t you think?  Maybe the Lord is keeping her alive just to teach me more through taking care of this helpless, and often seemingly ungrateful butterfly.

So, this has been my butterfly experience.  Today I noticed that her wings are almost gone on one side and her color is faded.  My heart cries out for the lost beauty of this little one but after 3 weeks of watching her struggle to be what she is suppose to be yet never taking flight, if she could understand I have this to say to her:   

You are battered, but loved;

Fragile but protected

Your beauty has faded but you speak volumes of the beauty of the Lord.

The Lord is taking care of us daily!  Taking care ofyou daily!  We don’t see it and often we struggle to try to take care of ourselves (as the world tells us to do).  Maybe you now see yourself with curved wings and are unable to fly the way you want to.  Perhaps you are someone who has been struggling and since then your wings have become battered and maybe even almost completely destroyed by the world.  Remember that your Heavenly Father in Heaven sees, knows and will take care of you.  Stop trying to fly when you were meant to walk.  We will all have our wings to fly (figuratively speaking – not like angels) when we get to heaven and see Jesus face to face and become like Him.  For now, I think we ALL are handicap butterflies with battered wings who just want to take flight in spiritual truths.  Our sin keeps us fluttering on this earth, destroying our wings in the process and leaving us tired and hungry for God even more.  Become a butterfly who is surrendered to the provision of the Master’s Hand.  Learn to gain nourishment and sit quietly on God’s provided flowers of your own and soak in the SON!

To see photos of our pet butterfly journey, please check outhttp://www.flickr.com/photos/40626232@N00/sets/72157602134520062/and then press select "View as slideshow" on top right-hand side and then when it’s done loading, click the "i" icon in the middle of the first picture and it will display the text descriptions with the pictures of our journey thus far.  You can use your mouse pointer to navigate the slide show by pressing the arrows to the right & left-hand sides. Please enjoy them!

One more thing…sad but true…ironically, the day after I wrote this (now Monday at 1pm), we went outside to find the butterfly, and it was gone.  All the kids joined in trying to find it because with the few fallen leaves, she looks more like a leaf than a colorful butterfly.  But with much searching, we are unable to find her.  Our cats are in, but perhaps some other mishap has happened to her.  Josiah is crying for his "Cutie" as if he has lost a dear friend.  It is strange how the Lord pressed on my heart to write this insightful parable of the butterfly, and then seem fit to take it out of our lives the next day.  But the lesson I have learned and memory of "Cutie" will live in our hearts and minds forever.

Broken Hangers; Broken Lives

Today I threw away but yet another plastic hanger!  This one had it's hook severed off!

It's my kids!  It's really not entirely their fault, though.

You see, since we currently have three boys in one average-sized room, we sectioned off the closet into an upper and lower area to hang clothes.  Every season we reverse them so the most current season is easily accessible on the bottom.  However, usually in the winter season, they desire to wear something short-sleeve, so they choose a shirt from the top area but it is high and only but one can really reach the hanger itself.  So the other two resort to just pulling on the sleeve of the desired piece of clothing to get it down, often sacrificing a hanger - or two - or three - or…oh you get the idea.

It never really struck me - broken hangers - and what they could mean.  I would just ask the boys to please stop pulling them at the sleeve so I wouldn't have to buy anymore.  They often replied, "I know…" or "…but Mom, it's too high for me to reach the hanger!"  "Then get a chair or ask me or somebody else taller to help," I would reply.

Truth is, it IS too tall for them and it IS too much trouble to get a chair or ask someone.  Thus many a broken hangers rest in a landfill that are marked, "Just not worth it; just not worth the trouble."

Strange, I never thought of anything about it until today.  I was throwing away the hookless hanger and in the trashcan lay it's fellow comrade - the broken-at-the shoulder hanger, which looking at it, doesn't look broken at all but it was!  Another two bite the dust.

God spoke to me, as strangely as he does through everyday common objects.  He reminded me that many lives are like these broken hangers; many seem not worth the trouble to help from not getting broken in the first place and are not given a second thought to those using them.  Careless people use them, break them and then "unfriend" them from their lives.  Some of these broken people are physically obvious as they walk the streets asking for another handout or lay in the hospital waiting for the night nurse.  Some are emotionally broken as they hand you your change at the check out, always thinking of 'that thing' ready to cry at any moment.  While some, surprisingly, are spiritually broken, quietly sitting next to you with their Bible open wide; perhaps not even knowing how much they need to be fixed.  

But are these broken people throw aways to be forgotten?

The Lord showed me something else about these two hangers.  One of them was cut off at the hook which is where all the weight bears on and only by a miracle (or lots of glue and tape) could it be repaired.  However, the other was broken at the shoulder which caused it to appear just fine outwardly, but with a little squeeze you then could see the break.  This one could easily be repaired with a little love and care.

Now, if you know nothing about me, know this!  I love to recycle, fix, re-purpose and creatively find ways to use something someone else sees as just-a-throw away object.  There are many things that just can't be fixed, are good-for-nothing and should be thrown away.  On the other hand, other things can be recycled, re- purposed or repaired if someone had a vision and a caring, creative hand.

Using GOOP glue, fixed it at the broken area then wrapped the entire hanger with tie-dye duck tape.  Now, it's one of my favorite hangers and instead of hanging in my boy's closet, it now proudly hangs in my own; it belongs now to me!  Also, I found duck tape provides great traction for clothing that likes to slip off to one side.  That's a bonus I wasn't expecting!  It's now actually more useful than before!

With these hangers, God's object lesson is that broken lives can have two expected ends.  They can become completely unusable for their purpose, only to be thrown into the trash like my hanger that was broken at the head - um,  I mean, hook.  It would only take a miracle of God and lots of work to help that person out of their broken condition but with God, ALL things are possible!  The second, however, is like the hanger broken at the shoulder; there are many people that are broken inwardly but they don't appear to be outwardly but with a little squeeze in their lives, it can show.  These people can be repaired, repurposed, treasured and become of better use than before when yielded to being wrapped in the Holy Spirit in the love within the care of the creative hand of the Almighty.  The outcome will be by the touch of His hand, they will now belong to Him.

What can you take from this Life Lesson?  Well, I believe we are all broken hangers to some sort.  Well, for me I feel Psalms 147:3 sums up this illustration, "He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds."  You can find numerous verses for your broken heart in God's Word that would speak to your situation specifically because not every person is broken the same way and most have been broken many ways.

So How ARE you broken?  How have you been broken in the past?

Are there sins in your life that nobody else knows about and you are broken about them, ready to give them to God for a repair?  You are broken.

Are you estranged from a loved one and need God's healing touch on your relationship? You are broken.

Have you lost a loved one - family or friend - and are/have been grieving for them?  You are broken.

Do you harbor anger in your heart toward someone who has mistreated you and now anger has turned into bitterness?  You are broken.

Has sickness overtaken your life only to find you crying out to Jesus in the middle of the night?  You are broken.

Has a difficult and stressful situation risen up in your life that has caused you to lose sleep and come to the end of yourself?  You are broken.

Have your been broken at the most important part of your being; your head; your heart - and the Lord has miraculously healed up your broken wounds and made all things new? - You WERE broken; but now are healed.

Brokenness can lead you into two different directions.  You can either choose to stay broken and walk away from God's healing OR (this is the better choice here), you can choose to run to Jesus in your brokenness, no manner what it is, and let Him heal, mend, protect, provide and give you peace in the turmoils of your life.  I choose this path.

I am and always have been a broken hanger!  Sometimes my brokenness is apparent; sometimes it's hidden but I have more breaks, more layers of glue and duck tape on me that I care to image.  I have been crying out to Jesus since I was a little girl for all my turmoils, and I will continue.  I'm so glad the Jesus is the great recycler and has viewed me more than just a throw-away.  In fact, He views all man-kind as redeemable, but only a few will yield to his repair.  Are you now willing for God to make his repairs on you and cause you to stand out for his Glory?

One Lousy Box!

Trying to get through my bedroom to make sale-show ready, I noticed two boxes at the base of my bed that had been there for quite some time.  As I lifted the clothes that were piled on top of them I realized that they were two half-filled boxes that add up to one box that I had asked Michael to go through since before he had left.  There they still sit!  It set me off in my mind.  Satan began taking a stronghold of my thoughts and anger began to rise up in me.  With all that is going on I began to entertain these thoughts,

"ONE LOUSY BOX!  Just one lousy box!  He couldn't even take 10 minutes out of his time to go through his mail and stuff with one lousy box!  I even had to do everything in his desk!  Sure he put up all the new lights in the house and fixed things before he left, but most of those things were stuff HE wanted to do and felt needed to get get done to sell the house.  But the FEW things I asked him to do before he left - this box and desk - he didn't do.  Oh, I'm so mad!"

Suddenly, my son Josiah walks in and sees me write on my blog not knowing what was going on in my mind.  He asked me what I was doing as I began to type just the title of this new entry.  I turned around to him and said, "Never you mind!" and then he walked away sadly.

My heart was cold and then I realized what I had just done.  I just transferred my anger onto my innocent son!

Just then, before he even got a chance to shut the door, I called him back in.  I apologized and then told him the real reason for my anger.  I needed him to know that I wasn't angry at him, but at Daddy.  He understood and then left the room.

The reason I began to blog this is not to show my husband as irresponsible, because truth is he's one of the most trusted, reliable and responsible people I know - the real reason was to release my anger and to show my sin.

I know that if I write down how I feel, in black and white, then the Lord can reveal to me what He's trying to tell me.

I didn't know Satan was trying to take a stronghold of my mind until I wrote that 4th sentence, "Satan began taking a stronghold of my thoughts and anger began to rise up in me."  That sentence was from the Lord.  I could have stopped there and not continue to write because by this time I had a clear mind, but I chose to continue for any of you who might fall into the same trap.

2 Corinthians 10:5 is says, "

Casting down arguments, and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;

We CAN take a hold of angry thoughts and CHOOSE NOT to entertain them.  Pretend they are well known con-artists trying to get into your house and the Holy Spirit is your body guard.  Just ask the Holy Spirit to boot them out of the house of your mind, and he will if you first recognize them as the lies they really are.  However, in the times we are unable we can just ask our Holy Spirit Body guard, "Is this from God?"

Simple, right?

Not if you don't run to Jesus's right away when times like this come - and they WILL come.  We all are sinners living with each other and all of us fail the other person from time-to-time; it's just a fact of life.

"Dear Lord Jesus,

I'm sorry for the anger I had toward my dear, sweet husband.  Thank you for letting me see all that Michael HAS done for me and how wonderful he is.  Oh how I miss him.  Even now the enemy wants to bring in bad thoughts as we are away from each other.  By the power of your Holy Spirit, I will NOT give the enemy a foothold!  And Lord, please forgive me on the bad way I responded to my son.  Please forgive me and help me to recognize these negative thoughts as lies quickly in the near future.  Thank you for paying the price for me on the cross for my thoughts are wicked and your cleaning of my sins are true.  Thanks Jesus. Amen."

I feel much better now.  This is how most of this blog will be like.  Things of present and past that currently hurt or have hurt in the past will be written down for the world to see as to hopefully help someone in their lives.

The purpose of this new Blog….to glorify God's work in my life.

Happy New Year and welcome 2013!

Today began yet a new chapter in my life.

I am a homeschooling Mom with six kids.  Currently our family lives in a suburb of Cleveland, Ohio but we are currently packing to move to Seattle, Washington.

This morning my husband left for his new job.

I am now like a military Mom, at the home front with six kids and all the responsibilities.  Boxes being packed, appointments to be kept, house to be cleaned, food to be prepared, school to be be done, friends who want to be seen…friends who will be missed.

This is not an easy time in my life, but it's not the first I've moved so far.  In fact, this move is the CLOSEST move I've done.  However, it is a bigger move than the other times because now I have twice as many kids, 10X more stuff and for the first time, I'm at the mercy of someone buying my house before I'm reunited with my husband again.

It also gave me an empty bedroom and a computer just waiting to be typed on.  "That blog - that blog that's been on my mind for all of these years - should I start it now?  It might help me cope with things."  So here I begin.

I've had many new chapters and as I reflected on my past, I felt led to start writing some of the life lessons I've learned throughout my life that God has lead me through and those current as well.  I'm hoping this blog will be an encouragement to help people recognize how God moves in their lives.  Since childhood, I've had many "God Lessons" that I had no idea I was learning until later in life.  I just felt led to record them, for the glory of God - that He has lead me through this life - and not to the glory of myself or the same of others who have hurt me.  I will be as candid and as discreet as I need to be but I pray that the Lord will lead me with the words.  My desire is that this blog will glorify him in the end.